I hate email.

Why?

Today, if people have good stuff they want to say to me, or amazing information they want me to know, they either call, text, or FB.

Email is reserved for the crap I don’t really want to have to deal with: students complaining, bills, junk, deadlines and expectations and the “stuff” of life.

This morning I did my daily check of campus email.

And lo and behold, an email from the “boss.”

Now, to give you a bit a context, this “boss” is not really my boss. He didn’t hire me and can’t fire me.  He can’t even assess me (not that assessment ever happens, but if it did, he wouldn’t be the one that would do it).

If I have a problem with a student, he isn’t the one I contact.

He obtained his “position” of power as he is the sole full-time, tenure-tracked faculty member within our little sub-department within the department.

What that means, is that he has a real job at the college with access to all the tools, resources and people he needs to do his job successfully.

Oh.

And he is compensated for it.

I am just a lowly-adjunct.

I get laid off every 18-19 weeks, am contingent, don’t have parity in pay or access to insurance benefits.

Plus, on campus, I don’t have access to basic tools of teaching and higher education instruction unless I beg, borrow, or steal information.

Or, sometimes, I get shit done because I am part of the Adjunct Mafia – I know people and call in favors when times are tough.

This morning I woke up to an email from the “Boss” telling me that my “student enrollment numbers are being scrutinized” because as of the end of last week, I wasn’t at student enrollment caps.

That means, people dropped OR didn’t “add” the class.

Not. My. Problem.

He continued to “email lecture” me about the importance of adding students and filling enrollments and all the administrative bull shit he is being fed (and, after the meeting we had last week) and gobbling down like it was the most delicious cake he has ever been blessed with.

I don’t think that he understands that (1) I don’t fucking care.  The enrollment issue is NOT my issue.  My job is to teach. If enrollment numbers aren’t where they want them, that is administration’s fuck up…not mine (2) He isn’t my boss.  It really doesn’t matter what he says. He has no pull or power and the lecture that is pouring out of his mouth not only is irrelevant, it is coming from an irrelevant place of power (as in, he has none).

However, the interesting thing about this whole dead exchange is that apparently, administrators (or the pseudo-administrator) is playing Big Brother and watching the numbers of students in my class.

Lovely.

Determine of quality of instructional prowess based on the number of people who are enrolled in my class.

Nobody fucking cares what happens INSIDE the classroom and what the students are learning.

That is a problem.

For example, my numbers are being scrutinized (something, mind you, which I have NO CONTROL over), yet nobody seems to care what is happening.

For example, I am teaching three sections of communication courses this semester…all three are different sub-subjects of my disciple.

Two of the classes are classes I have never taught on this campus.

And for these two classes, although I requested the books (following administrative protocol) approximately 12 weeks prior to the start of the Spring semester, right this second, 1.5 weeks into the semester, I have YET to receive one of the texts books.

The other book I received the business day prior to classes starting.

Meaning, I had to design, organize, plan and actually INSTRUCT two out of three classes without the textbook.

Sweet.

THAT IS A FUCKING PROBLEM!

Based on that, who cares how many people I have enrolled or don’t have enrolled in my classes.  I don’t have access to the MOST BASIC TOOL of the course.  Do administrators really want students enrolled in a class with an educator who wasn’t provided the textbook?  And not even just the physical text book, I didn’t even have the title/publishing information about the book.  One textbook reference I was given was actually an incorrect book, meaning, I rolled into class on Day 1 rocking the wrong fucking book.

Nice.

So – what is wrong with higher education?

First, administrators are so busy filling seats and counting heads, they don’t seem to realize that inside the classrooms, their educators don’t have the tools to teach.

And frankly, I really don’t think they care

(that is what happens with administrators come from a corporate pipeline and not an academic one)

And here is another example that might support this.

This semester I had the opportunity to read over the syllabus and assignments of some of my peers. And what I saw was pretty bothersome.

A syllabus I read was virtually identical to a course that is no longer offered on campus because the curriculum was outdated and irrelevant…and worse, wasn’t even the same course that should have been taught.

That basically means, a syllabus from 1974 Intro to K-12 Education was used to teach 2012 Intro to Higher Education.

Same family…different worlds.

Yet, when I brought this up, I was shot down.

My “boss” told me that he can’t “asses” curriculum, syllabi, etc.

What?!  Whose job is that, then?

Someone needs to hold the people in the department accountable.

And if not, why in freaking world do I spent HOURS (and by that I mean HOURS AND HOURS AND HOURS) every semester designing courses that are relevant, appropriate, meaningful, and chalk full of shit students should be learning based on the course subject and campus handbook when I could just do what is easier and teach stuff that I want in a way that I want?

Higher education, truly, is a place where there is a LOT of flexibly for faculty.  however, that is why the process to become a tenure-line faculty member, and even get your PhD is so arduous.  You have to PROVE to a peer group that you can not only remain current in your discipline, but share that currency with students.

The problem with community colleges, is that even the full-time bluffs don’t go through that process.

And worse, adjunct faculty don’t either (and these are the faculty teaching the bulk of the load of students).

So – here I have scathing “Big Brother” emails from an “un-boss” about numbers.

Yet, I don’t have the resources to teach a good class AND I KNOW that other classes in the department (which surely are over-enrolled) aren’t being taught at standards.

So- what happens?

Nothing.

I responded to the email in a very politically correct, “Of course I will watch enrollment numbers” {which I will not, because that isn’t something I can control. That is what happens in the admissions office, marketing, senior administration and registrars desk}.

The courses I know that are shit will continue to be taught like shit.

The tools I need (like textbooks) will continue to be out of reach, unless I pull in the Adjunct Mafia to do my bidding.

It’s a mess.

The solution to this issue is insanely simple.

But, I am not even going to feed it to you because at the end of the day, it isn’t going to make a lick of difference.

What I do know is that:

1. Faculty aren’t being ‘scrutinized’ for the right things by the right people.

And that is all.

So – my “un-boss” can fuck-off with his enrollment numbers and lectures.

I will continue to do what  I do best in the classroom and say the ‘right’ thing to the ‘right’ people if I can control my tongue.

And even without the text book, I will continue to create amazing learning environments, because that is what I do.

And as for my “un-boss” – well, I can promise the ‘delete’ button will be my automatic response to the rest of his emails this semester.

I’ve learned it really doesn’t matter what I do – so, I’ll act based on my own, self-imposed educational standards.

And I’ll ignore the “un-boss” – he can’t make or break me, so I’ll just treat him as a non-entity.

Welcome to the world of the Adjunct.